05 January 2012

Man Who Exposed Himself At Screening Of 'Chipwrecked' Actually More Interesting To Look At Than 'Chipwrecked'

If you're planning on catching a movie at Chicago's North Riverside Park Mall's Classic Cinemas theater, you miiiight want to rethink that decision. Unless you like seeing a whole lot of penis.
About a half hour into the 4 p.m. showing of the kiddie feature Alvin and the Chipmunks: Chipwrecked, police say an entirely naked Edward L. Brown stood up from his seat in the front row, faced the crowd of 86 theater-goers, stretched out his hands and displayed his genitalia for all to see before sitting back down to enjoy the movie.
The theater manager, meanwhile, stopped the film and offered refunds or vouchers to another show for those who were in the theater at the time of the incident. 
Yes, because when you go to a children's movie and wind up seeing some stranger hanging dong, the #1 thing on your list is to COME BACK TO THAT THEATER.
 According to the police report, Brown told officers that he had been let inside the movie theater for free by an unknown female who allegedly told him to have a seat in the front row of the theater, take off his clothes and wait for her, so they could have sex, smoke crack and do heroin.
This can only mean one thing: Tyrone Biggums has moved to Chicago.


cf9dc71a-37af-11e1-89b1-000f20980440 said...

You know Joe Rogan, this isn't the 1st time I've exposed my penis. I've done it several times in my line of work. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.

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